Why did we choose “this” decision?

by Psychology0 comments

I‘m thinking.

I‘m still thinking.

I know.





“I’m Anna and I’m 18. A few days ago I made the most important decision of my life. I was brought up in a religious family in which faith was the ultimate value. At first I protested with my loved ones, and after a while I understood the meaning – I decided to become a nun.”




“I have a problem. I wonder if you’ll repeat what your parents say to me. I’m a year old and I think my name is Staś. I see and hear it every day and I don’t know how many days have passed. Some radiant face looks at me and to my boredom repeats the word: Mom. Does that mean I have to call her that?”




“I’m dying. I’m lying down and falling asleep slowly. I’m on the bed of truth, and I’m so damn busy I can’t think. Did I do well to choose…?”




We all have a choice. Whether we are aware of it or not, we make decisions.










How do they affect our lives?

Until what point are they unconscious or unaware?

Are we able to objectively determine this?

Why does it become so hard for us?

Why do others decide for us?

What drives us?

Do I choose my heart or my mind?




A person’s conscious decisions begin to take shape and function properly in life when he or she reaches emotional maturity. It consists in rational thinking and the realisation of one’s plans and goals. We are 18 years old. We enter adulthood – at least provisional, because at that age we have a choice and are responsible for our actions. During this period, the first decisions we make by ourselves appear. Family and friends can help by advising and raising awareness, although it is in our interest to choose. This is just the beginning! Later on, the choice becomes more and more difficult. Decisions are not hasty and their choice affects the subsequent decisions. So what is a decision? It is a conscious and personal ability to choose the actions, things or people that will influence our next choices. It can also be identified with a sequence of events that affect each other. This is a unique kind of correlation. Every day we make an incredibly large number of decisions. We don’t think about them and we do it subconsciously because we are able to quickly determine the role and positivism of this behaviour. The problem arises with ignorance and uncertainty. When we are not sure of a given choice, it is not so easy to make a position. Not only do we decide for ourselves, but also for our children when they do not yet have the appropriate qualifications to make a choice. Of course we are talking about the little ones who are not able to decide on their food habits, their first years of education and their initial behaviour. All these aspects are shaped by patterns – that is, for most children, parents. It is parents who make the first decisions for their children and show them the importance and essence of this activity. It is often said that not everyone is ready to have children. A large number of people wonder about this statement and whether they would be ready for such a responsibility themselves. Let’s think about how how we can get an answer as to whether we are developed and mature enough to assume the role of a parent. Age doesn’t matter much here, although it is clear that teenagers shouldn’t think about it at that age. Let’s ask ourselves, “How hard is it to make decisions for ourselves and others if we are not sure of our own decisions, let alone those of another person? We cannot determine whether a person would make the same decision as us. This is where the values that we profess are at stake. We try to decide on what is right and what is wrong. So the next question is, “What is right for me and what is right for you?” The rule of right is hard to define. There are no right or wrong statements. Only in subjectivity. But you can focus on what’s good and valuable to me. To define my own values, to think about my assumptions and goals. Think about the competences and qualities that I have. Think about what the behaviour leads to and perhaps ultimately, maybe not, make decisions.





And now let’s focus on the decisions.





Aneta Sznicer

Aneta Sznicer

Founder of Mood & Read, HR specialist, copywriter, marketer, and soon to be psychologist. I help people achieve their goals by teaching social skills. Personally, I love playing the piano, dancing and singing. Anything to do with music helps me to find myself in reality. If you listen carefully, you will be able to hear your emotions. If you are able to hear them, you will know yourself even better and stronger. Thank you for visiting my website. It is a pleasure to get to know you.

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