I know there are a lot of people who are annoyed by their partners not answering their phones. Yeah, it’s disrespectful and all that.
Let alone when our partner would go to a party or a social gathering without telling us. That would be a real disaster. I’m not saying that we’re all like that, but when I look at the relationships around me I often see it. Each of us are, as I stressed in another article, individualists. We have our own values and morals. We have our own families, we have our own hobbies and interests. It’s cool if the other person has similar ones, but more about this another time. We also have a great need for social interaction.
#Matthew has a need to go out with his buddies or play a few fifa tournaments.
#Agata on the other hand, she needs to go out with her friends or go out with the ladies.
And then what do you need your partner for?
Think about what it was like when you weren’t in a relationship and you didn’t have to confess to the other person of everything you do. Maybe you felt slower? Maybe you felt like you had more freedom?
So why not combine that old slack with being in a relationship? When you were single, you were able to manage your own time. Don’t you think you could still do it by dating a partner to spend time together, even living together? Let’s assume it’s Friday, you had nothing planned so your partner said he was going to a party. You’re angry with him because he hasn’t included you in his plans.
What if you both had separate plans for tonight?
It’s not just about leaving. You can read a book, watch a series, talk to a friend. You can do something for yourself and plan things like that. Planning helps with both the regularity and intensity of the day. I highly recommend using it.
Going back to partners.
We choose this particular person for a relationship. A we strive to connect with him/her and if we want to build such a deeper connection and discover a better understanding of each other, we should not limit ourselves just to each other. Let’s get to know our partner from the beginning without any limitations, then at the start we will know quite a lot about this man and with time we will discover more and more. This will allow us to get to know his true thinking, his insights and views, and he will know ours in return. We will get rid of unpleasant situations and parts of quarrels. We will then start to be free people with the necessary space to live, creating the best partnership that can be. We will be liberated from a large part of the negative emotions that are caused by a lack of conversation, common plans, and mostly an approach to the relationship. Treat our partners seriously and remember that the relationship with this person should be the most important for us because it leads to a common everyday life. Let’s be open to our partners. Let’s create a team. Let’s talk, show connection and bond, but while we do it, let’s be…
. . .
If you read this article and you know people with this problem, please direct them here. Maybe it will change their attitude to living together.