How often do you wonder about what you actually think?

How often do you have to say something contrary to what you think?

How often do you have the ability to limit yourself to what you say in order not to hurt another person?

A man often guards himself against the truth.

Most of us prefer to hear what we want to hear than what the other person really thinks.

And why does that actually happen?

“I’m afraid. I’m so afraid that I’ll hear the criticism and it will demotivate me. I don’t take such words seriously and I’m aware of it. I’m going to hear something I don’t like and it’s getting kind of saturated with the power and energy to continue creating.”

“I’m not interested in another man’s opinion, much less in the one I know and I know that honesty is hard on him. I know he’s telling me things that aren’t true because he’s afraid of offending me.”

“What if it’s not an honest opinion? How can I trust a man on such an important issue if I’ve been deceived so many times. I prefer to rely on myself and only believe in myself.”

“I met a friend I trusted a lot and I took her opinions into account. I found out after a while that she was telling me something different, and my friends were telling me something different. I began to wonder why this was happening and found that the reason was to fit in with everyone. I stopped taking people’s perceptions seriously.”

The above thoughts are short statements of random people when asked the above question. There were many more, but I found that most of them were about the same issue. So I chose only the single statements that seemed to me to make the most sense. Each of them focused on the lack of trust and fitting in with the other person, so it is no longer true. You have noticed that we live in a certain sense of theater. Everyone plays a role throughout their lives to fit in well with the changing environment.

Going on a job interview: We’re serious.

Going on a date: We’re smiling.

Going for a walk: We’re calm.

Going to the disco: We’re crazy.

Going to work: We’re focused.

Our lives are focused on living. Every day we experience a lot of emotions, and depending on which moment we find ourselves in, we will react adequately to it as well as adjusting our mood. After a contradiction with our partner we will be nervous and this emotion will last longer than we think. It will last until we react. And sport? We’ll go to the gym and after two hours of training we’ll go home. Our children will need help, and we’ll stay calm because we’re attentive. In the previous example, with the same behaviour, the children would react completely differently. Our nervousness would affect our attitude towards children and the level of persistent aggression and nerves would overide our ability to stay calm because this is where nervousness is the key emotion.

Do you understand this pattern?

Why do people react differently and say different things so often?

Maybe it’s not deception or insincerity.

Maybe it’s the emotions that live in this man and his fitting in with them.

Think about how it is with you…

Do emotions rule your life?

Can you harness them?

Or are they a friend? One who changes with you and brings you a whole range of attractions throughout your life?